We are all familiar with Jesus’ command to help those in need.
In Matthew 25:41-43 it reads:
“I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’ For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, “Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels.”
When it comes to helping others, sometimes we forget, or choose not, to help family. It’s easy to want to help those far away, that we hear about in the news, that we aren’t familiar with, that we don’t know intimately, that appear… to have no faults… While such people are deserving of help, we must also deal with family members, our friends, and members of the church with the same love and compassion that Christ showed us. Since we are more familiar with the faults of those close to us, it might tempt us into thinking “Well that person had it coming – look at how they lived.” or “They always nag / bother me / treat me with no respect – and I don’t like them” or “They are in jail, they’re beyond help” (Jesus specifically mentions this one).
There are two problems with these ways of thinking:
- Jesus commands us not to judge – unless we too want to be judged by the same measure. Unfortunately, we do this most often with family. None of us are perfect by God’s standards and we definitely need to remove the plank in our own eye before worrying about the speck of dust in our brother’s eye. When Matthew 7:5 says that this will help us to see clearly to remove that speck, I think this means that it humbles us, and it will lead to a pure heart, which we need when we seek to help build up others in Christ and not simply try to make ourselves feel better by comparison. This is what I think Luke 6:37 means when it states: ”Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” That last part especially, about forgiving… leads to my next point…
- Jesus knew (and continues to know) all of us intimately – faults, shortcomings, sin and all. Despite that, he not only forgave us, he sacrificed his own life in order to do it. We are commanded to forgive others, just as we have been forgiven. Unfortunately with family & friends we are less forgiving. We either hold them to a higher standard, or worse we take it personally. The Parable of the Unmerciful Servant in Matthew 18:21-35 states this nicely. In summary it reads that the servant begs for the king’s mercy because he couldn’t pay the large debt he owed him. The servant said he would pay back everything, just be patient with him. The king canceled his debt and set him free. It was more than he deserved. This is key – because this is what Jesus has done for all of us – given us more than we deserve. Despite that, when the servant was set free and encountered a fellow servant that owed him significantly less, he accosted the man, demanded his money, and after the other servant begged for mercy, he had him thrown in jail. When the king found out, he told the servant that he should have shown mercy, just as he had done to him. So he threw him in jail and tortured him until he could repay his debt.
Everything I was just talking about, is something I believe we do more with people we are close with, than with strangers or organizations that we simply ‘throw money at’ in order to fix a problem. All of these people are imperfect too, just like the people we are close to, or related to, or go to church with. It is purely an act of imagination to think otherwise. This is one of the tricks the devil uses to keep us from reaching out to others in our family, our church and our community.
We need to remember to help those closest to us with our money, time and goodwill. We are all imperfect and Jesus knew that. Yet he still forgave us, and as the Parable of the Unmerciful Servant makes clear, we must also forgive generously.